life – fromthiswindow

January 16, 2024

Disabled limiting beliefs

Rebecca, a white woman with brown hair, is sitting in her wheelchair.00. — Image description: Rebecca, a white woman with brown hair, wears a light green, dark green, light blue, light pink, red and brown diamond patterned closed brown buttoned cardigan with a green faux fur colour, red trousers and shoes . She also wears a green faux fur hat and holding a green bag. She is sitting in her wheelchair that has peach spoke guards with multicoloured butterflies dotted around on it. Rebecca is under a tree her legs are placed over the right armrest. She is smiling at the camera

Dear Reader,

At times life can feel a bit more challenging. Sometimes we know exactly why, and at other times it can be hard to pin point what is causing us to feel this fogginess and it feels excruciating when trying to lift this weight. No matter how we find ourselves at a low ebb, our self-chatter can massively contribute to how we feel. Like a lot of people, when finding myself in tricky waters, I can be the biggest mean girl to myself and this can just intensify my thoughts and feels like I’m standing on quick sand- it is all too ready to swallow me up!

I think a lot of disabled peers will say that internalised ableism can add a bloody great big layer to some of the not so glittery thoughts that we may experience from time to time. There seems to be a real under expectation of disabled people and therefore sometimes feel like we have to work harder to be seen and heard. This is witnessed time and time again in work environments, in education systems, in the travel industry, in relationships and what this looks like, in the media’s representation of disability… it’s endless -all whereby we, as disabled people, are prescribed to the type of role we play by society. However this narrative manifests, it can enable some of us to believe that we are not worthy or good enough or shouldn’t be where we are. I’ve done this countless of times, listening to self-doubt and the cunning charm of internalised ableism way too much, thinking that I should back out of something. It’s exhausting! But rather than realising that we are experiencing internalised ableism, these thoughts can latch themselves on to us and become part of the beliefs that we hold about ourselves.

It’s important to recognise the flavour of our thoughts, where they might have come from and how we can change this up, not letting them consume us.

I’ve listed below, some of the disabled limiting beliefs that I can experience and how I try to break through them. If you find yourself identifying with any of the following limiting beliefs, I hope that you find the tips/reminders that I pair them with helpful.

A limiting belief that I have sometimes is in regards to voicing my rights. Enquiring about wheelchair access or saying what I need can feel daunting sometimes. I never know how requests will be received, sometimes with a more than helpful attitude and others with a huff and a puff, when, say, putting down a portable ramp, or even hearing an out and out ‘no.’ The latter two responses can make me feel as if I shouldn’t say anything or shouldn’t be there. But over the last few years I’ve realised just how much my needs and wants are valid and more than that, I deserve the right to be there just as much as the next person. This is a reminder I repeat to myself when get that voice in my head is trying its best to get me swallowing my words. Disabled rights are human rights. I’ll admit, it’s a difficult thing to do but when you start just saying how things are, the less scary it can become- do not ever put your rights second!

My speech impediment is something that I can be really conscious off and get a little anxious over whether people will understand me. Last year, I got tired of confining myself I wanted to give myself a bit more freedom. One day I started just to speak into the camera. I normally just post text along with photos online to express my thoughts, never sharing my actual voice, so this was heart pounding stuff. Although very apprehensive at first when I started, I began to settle into it. It showed how I, and I’m sure that I am not alone in this, can magnify things in my mind and they can feel a bit more difficult than they actually are. When I posted this video online, people were absolutely lovely in response. Note to self- don’t spend too much time brewing over something and don’t give into your own doubt! I really want to do a bit more of this in the year ahead.

Rebecca, a white woman with brown hair is sitting in her wheelchair — Image description: Rebecca wears the same outfit as image 1. Her legs are swung over the right armrest of her wheelchair

Another limiting belief that I have is around time. A subject that I always get caught up on. My Cerebral Palsy means that it can take me a bit more time to do certain things. Sometimes this can really bother me, especially if in my head I am a step or two ahead. In them moments I believe that I should move faster. The more I try to do this though, the less my body becomes uncoordinated and so tasks take even longer to complete. The thing is everyone is running on their own clock and really…isn’t it about deserving yourself the time you need rather than folding yourself in two to meet an unrealistic time frame? It’s time (sorry!) to start setting realistic deadlines so you won’t burn out and that you can fully focus on the task in hand without forever clock watching.

I think this one is applicable to all humans really and surrounds the feeling of being enough. Coming from a disabled person’s perspective, a layer of this could be due to the structure of society and how the word, disabled, is branded. Looping back to the start of this blog post and the little expectations that non-disabled people can have of disabled people, it can make disabled people doubt themselves or believe that they need to prove who they are in order to be seen as enough. It was only through my twenties really that I realised that I didn’t need to do this. Discovering the social model of disability, which says that people are disabled by societial barriers, was a game-changer for me. I learnt that my disability wasn’t at fault. It was the world around me. I didn’t need to change. I didn’t need to prove who I was. It’s really easy cheesy to say try and not be moved/powered over by stigma but really just being yourself is all you can be. You are enough as you are.

I hope that by sharing some of my limiting beliefs and I how am trying to break them down a little and not letting them have as much power, perhaps it’s given you food for thought as to how to tackle your own limiting beliefs. And remember there just beliefs, not the truths

All my love XX

September 12, 2023September 13, 2023

A Complicated Relationship with Shoes

An old photo of ten year old Rebecca, a white girl with brown hair, She is wearing her school uniform with Piedro boots and is sitting in her wheelchair. — Image description: An old photo of a ten year old Rebecca, a white girl with brown hair that is in a plat (out of view). She is wearing her school uniform-a brown jumper and a knee length skirt. She is also wearing with Piedro boot with knee high white socks. She is sitting in her wheelchair across the road from her primary school

Piedro boots. Memories of embarrassment and wishing for their non-existence comes with hearing or thinking of these shoes. Shoes that I’m wearing in the photo above- I think I am about ten here. The nature of my disability means that when I do walk, my shoes have to have ankle support-so not every pair of shoes that I set my eyes on I can wear-. This term ‘ankle support’ was so pronounced when I was younger. I felt so othered by it, when I was told about the type of shoes that I should be wearing.

Receiving yet another box of specially made shoes I hoped that they would somehow be more of a vibe, more of a pair of shoes that I would in every way feel comfortable to wear, even though I knew what I was getting. I thought they didn’t match my identity, but, really, I was trying to chase somebody else’s. This was especially true when I grew into my teenage years.

Most of us growing up wanting to do whatever we can to fit in, no matter how comfortable or uncomfortable it feels. We might pretend to like particular music or style our hair in a certain way or perhaps we try to suspend an aspect of our personality, or, like I did, want to wear a pair of shoes like the rest of my peers had. I was a Noughties teen and at that time Dolly shoes were all the trend, and so I wanted to get in on this too.

After some tough persuasion, I had my own cute little black pair with a bow at the front. I felt soo cool! I also thought this a small way to claim that I was a teenager. However there were only so many times that the back of the shoes would come away from my heel, when I would take a few steps, making me even more unbalanced, before I realised that these shoes weren’t making me comfortable like I thought they would. This was hard to admit.

As I write now, I think about those who dress their feet in plasters to save their feet from getting sores and compromising squashed toes for stunning outfit details- we’ve all got that t-shirt, in one way, and shoes to match!

The thing is though it is never just about shoes or music or hair styles or whatever else we are trying to mold ourselves into. It’s about who we feel we are when we are seen sporting these fashion trends or bopping to popular tunes and, more importantly, how we feel when we are without these things.

Secretly, I was hoping that if I was seen wearing these Dolly shoes it would somehow gloss over my disability. That (and I do apologies for the wording of the rest of this sentence-it just captures my thoughts back then) even though I was in a wheelchair, these shoes would allow me to pass as a Noughties teen, with disability not being part of the equation. How silly was I? Of course these shoes wouldn’t mean that suddenly my disability would be hidden from view like some kind of magic or something This… magic dust, if you like, would come years later, unpicking ablism and finding my identity as a disabled woman, beginning to feel comfortable with my disability.

When I started to settle into my disability, I started to recognize the shoes my feet actually needed. The term ‘ankle support’ no longer set shivers down my spine. It actually sets me free as it communicates my needs, and enable me to feel comfortable in the shoes I wear. Now I know what will make my feet happy.

I must admit though, it would be a whole lot easier if more accessible footwear was available.

Do I still feel my heart pang when I see shoes in the shop window that I can’t wear? Absolutely! Am I picturing an entire outfit based around those shoes? Absolutely! But when I think how I might feel in those shoes… that giddy excited feeling slowly evaporates. I know if I wore those shoes, I would be uncomfortable….and so those shoes that a few minutes ago (sometimes times this take a lot longer) receives a head turn. As I go in search for shoes that makes me feel giddy, excited and comfortable!

This is a reminder to anyone with a complicated relationship with shoes: Stop stealing everyone else’s shoes, dance in your own!

All my love XX

April 25, 2023

Four reminders

Dear Readers,

Woooo! It’s been a very long while since I wrote on here! In fact the last time I wrote on here we were transitioning from summer to autumn and now a whole other season has passed.

The reason. Well really, I have no excuse only to say that I’m not a very good juggler! But for a while now I have been itching to get back to blogging things and today is that day!

I want to write here, a few little notes for both you, and also I, to keep moving forwards or even to how we might go about being at ease with where we are- an underestimated thing and something I find personally hard to do. I tend to overly self-access looking for things I’ve missed or not executed as well as I should have or what’s next (attempting to ensure that the next thing leaves no room for errors). I know sometimes we can get ourselves in to a slump in one way or another and the other day I thought about what are those things that help me, and I wanted to write them here.

So, here goes (btw these.. ‘tips’ are just me thinking out loud- so use, don’t use, add remove or even ignore.)

Do more of what you love and reframe from internalizing ableism

A lot of us have a guilt thing around pleasure and feel like we need to ‘earn’ enjoyment. The contents of, and how much, enjoyment we ‘allow’ ourselves to have will be measured by how much we’ve ‘worked for it.’ We have become our own unnerving headteacher that everyone dreads (Matilda’s Mrs. Trunchball type).

As a disabled person who needs more time to do things day-to-day, I feel sometimes I should be doing twice as much in order to seek reward. Though we know this thinking is nonsense, playing into that ableist view, and that everyone goes at their own pace. So for those of us that identify as disabled or chronically ill this is a reminder to not chew on ableist words. You deserve, we deserve, just as many ‘nice’ moments as non-disabled people

It could be spending time with family and friends, exploring new places, reading a good book without thinking of what we could be doing or anything else that puts a smile on our hearts.

Comparison’s a thief

We don’t have to look far before we find that we are pitting ourselves against someone or something else doing something better, or leaves us, in whatever way, feeling less. I mean we all like to push ourselves and make improvements if we want. But it can also make us overly self-criticize, which can stop us on our tracks.

So how can we stop this? I don’t think there’s a definitive answer. But I do think a part of this is about being more aware when we are comparing ourselves and that the thing that we are comparing ourselves to something that is bigger and complex than what we are perceiving. Social media is a great example of comparing ourselves to someone else’s photos, status updates and snippets of their lives. But the same people also have parts that they choose not to share and are more than likely doing the same- comparing themselves to another person.

So we need to try to prevent ourselves from going down the rabbit hole and just remember that what we think is not the complete story and that everyone is just trying their best, including ourselves.

Connection is key

Humans are social beings. The amount of which will vary though, with each individual having their own unique social battery. Some peoples’ runs flat quickly if they socialize too much and need time away to charge, while other social batteries can be sustained and even be fueled by socializing.

I don’t want to sound greedy here, but I think I’m a bit of both. Sometimes i just need space and other times being with others is more than a want, but a need. I believe that perhaps our social battery is dependent on how and who we are spending it with.

No matter which way we flip I think that when we are not feeling our best a lot of us will turn to a trusted person or people in our lives and also when things are going well.

Loved ones can always energize me just by being with them…. I hope this can be the same for you too and if not let this be a reminder that it’s okay to step away and reconnect with yourself.

Get out of your own way!

Okay, this is another cliché but it true. We spend so much time thing about What ifs and worrying and talking ourselves out of things that in the time which we are doing all that, we could have done the things that we are putting off. This is a whole lot easier saying than actually doing, but by trying to be more of a doer we can break the habit of sabotaging ourselves. So before you completely talk yourself out of doing something-just go for it!

These are a few things that help me get out of my own head sometimes. I hope these can help you too.

All my love XX

October 4, 2022October 5, 2022

Disabled Expectations Among Other Things

Image description; Rebecca a white woman with brown har, wears a pink jumper khaki green jeans , a purple scarf and rainbow shoes . She sits in her wheelchair that has peach spoke guards with multicoloured butterflies dotted around on it.. Rebecca is on a bank by a lake.

Dear Reader,

I started writing this post early in September and it strangely took me a while to form my thoughts. Whilst I speak about the changing of seasons-summer to autumn-, I think some of the reflections I make can be applied, somewhat, to any time, to one’s own personal seasons too. This is why I have left the wording as it is. I have truly enjoyed losing myself and discovering as I wrote this piece. And so I hope you are able to go with me on this and also enjoy this read.

________________________

September sees the last utterings of summer. The shortening of length of light by a minute each day, as September ages. indicated that this warm season is coming to a close. Some of us grow back down into routines, after a period of perhaps adventure or a simple pause from the daily workings, if only a while. Maybe the sun, radiating the last of its warmer rays, is soothing us back into our everyday, or maybe trying to echo an element of hope, if it didn’t have that sparkle that you thought it would have- that everyone says it has.

For some of us summer is the season where life seem the most vivid and has an abundance of colour and everything feels that bit more possible…rose-tinted glasses much? I think so. How many times have you heard recently the phrase ‘holding on to summer’? I know I’ve heard this quite a few times in recent weeks. Don’t get me wrong we all want to spend times in the warmth of the sun, but I think that something about fixating and trying to anchor ourselves on something that is fleeting will always leave us defeated; the passage of time will always win. This is a message that has rippled through out the U.K and beyond, with what’s been in the news recently- that, for a lot of us, draws on parts of our own lives, somewhat, making us reflect.

Wow! That got deep so quick! I don’t know but it’s something that I’ve thinking a lot about recently- that the volume of life left to pass in the timer is constantly shrinking. I say the above like I’ve aced and surrendered to the unknown, but that could not be any further from the truth. If we are going full on confessional mode-the unknown is my biggest fear.

I know the unknown has its sparingly exciting charms about it, like discovering a new dish(linguine is a recent for me and is all kinds of delicious) or exploring a new place (especially if disabled access guaranteed) and not knowing what you might find, or how a piece of work might take shape, like writing this, or the anticipation of what will happen next in Virgin River (new-to me swoonworthy series I have found on Netflix) that kind of thing. But the bigger stuff that plays on your heart strings and have unsettling tones is something that has me reach for the duvet.

For me summer as an air of nostalgia to it and gets me in a reflective mood. I toy with all of the unanswerable questions like ‘what ifs’ and ‘what could have beens’. I am also increasingly aware that in just a couple months’ time will be entering my last year of my twenties-I mean it would be a worry if I didn’t know my own age, good lord I would be more infantized than I am now, by others, as a disabled person- but that’s a whole other story. What I mean is the heart pounding thoughts of not having my ducks in a row, or not and being the person that my eighteen-year-old self thought I would be ten years on.

My teenage self-romanticized what young age adulthood would be like, I think most of us do at when we’re young. We want independence, we want to be seen in our own right and taken seriously. More personally- I thought that I would stop being infantilized but spoiler alert, I haven’t. I was naive to think disabled adults would be treated the same as non-disabled people.

As a disabled woman, the expectations which I am held to are different. You think I would be slightly relieved to be released the from expectations, but in fact I am annoyed at this. Why the hell should I get off lightly?

Do you remember egg and spoon races at school? Well my ball never fell off my spoon… confused? You would be right to. No it’s not that this activity that magically calmed my tremors, in a strange contradictory technique, it actually made them more aggravated. The truth was that the ball was stuck to my spoon as on its own the ball would fall of within two seconds. I did feel bad for cheating- if it’s any consolation I would always come in one of the last places-, but I guess my teachers just wanted me to feel involved somehow and that was their way of doing this.

My adult self is spilt in two about this scene on the one hand it allowed that kid who was the only physically disabled kid in her primary school not to be left out and feeling the odd one out. However, the other part of me looks at the message this sends out for the bigger things- that disabled people goes through life, and must be treated differently. Yes in some respects we do navigate the world that deviates from non-disabled people i.e some of us need an extra pair of hands for certain activities, or accessing a building via a ramp and not a staircase. This is only seen as different because society views it like this, not incorporating this into the mainstream. Another message from this says that disabled people cannot be seen to drop their ball. Because society views disabled people with a fragile lens, and so to everything they can not to ‘let’ us break, no matter the cost, cushioning us from the world. And also because ‘dropping the ball’, so to speak, would go against that other bizarre narrative that holds disabled people on a pedestal (goody- two-shoes type thing ) and says that disabled people couldn’t possibly fail and oversee our humanness and need to fail-and not being over or under berated for this- not that one should ever be judged for their failures.

So if we use the analogy of the egg and spoon- us, disabled people, being the egg, the spoon being the rest of the world, we need the glue, being the stereotypes or ideas about disabled people, that holds the egg (or us) in one fixed position to be eroded and let us be trusted and encouraged to just be . We need to be seen as humans, that can fail.

I digress. As I have written soo many times before it took me years to speak openly about my disability, unlike now whereby I could write about disability till the cows come home! I wonder if I was more willing to embrace my disability sooner where would I be? Would it have led me to taking different pathways? Of course, I will never know the answers to these questions and this pattern of thought isn’t helpful either. It’s an exercise though I’m sure pretty much everyone knows the mechanisms of, which may include pondering over what another life led could have looked like, missed opportunities, saying no rather than yes or vice-versa perhaps even mulling over past regrets. Still, this reflective practice will be unique to everyone who does this.

I don’t think there is any definitive resolution to these woes, as I think it is something that is naturally reoccurring and is a part of what it is to be human But I think in these moments of thinking back, growing quite and almost yearning for time gone by, we can’t let these times be all consuming and keep us fixated on the past.

So as we approach the end of September, the end of summer and the start of autumn, instead of trying to keep a hold of what is moving away from us, to try and release the grip around this. As I said above time will always win, and as much as we can feel defeated we can’t always perceive this character as an enemy. The time we have at this very moment can be used in any way we like-how cool is that. How we use it, is up to us!

I hope this has provide food for thought for you as we transition to the next season.

All my love XX

February 9, 2021

Untitled

Photo taken by @mairead.may
Image description: Sunset in a field, with the sky shades of blues, pinks, oranges and yellows

What am I thinking? I don’t know what to write. My thoughts are even obscure to me. Am I being to personal? Too impersonal? Finding words too distance to capture my mind.

Since the passing of Dad in November, it’s has been an incredible challenge to write any thoughts. It’s as if the craft I known that gives me a sense of solace and releasing nature has somehow faded, as I find it ever harder to form sentences and orchestrate the right words. All feels too out of reach. Too foreign. But here I try to piece together some reflections, some which may be a little disjointed in places.

People say so casually, ‘Life is too short.’ ‘Life is too short’ to self-persuade to make that purchase on them beautifully decorated jeans that you keep day dreaming about. ‘Life is short’ as a bid to talk yourself in to a day off from the daily hustle and just retreat in something that gives pleasure, rather than just doing it anyway. ‘Life is short’ to banish the guilt spindle that your mind plays when you reach the end of a crisp packet. ‘Life is too short’ when you try to put out the fire over the woes you have as you try to look at the bigger picture, or try to convince someone else too to worm your way out of something. ‘Life is too short’ is said in response to just about anything to reduce ambivalence or fear over something.

But life is too short. A snap shot of time that we experience. A period of time that we forget to cherish. A time that its fragility is only made known when we have witnessed the gut-wrenching truth of this once fleeting statement.

As I write this, I wonder what Dad thought of time, how he perceived it, what he would have done differently and what he wished to do. Life and time did not play a kind hand to Dad. From a young man Dad had Multiple Sclerosis, in which consumed more and more of him over time, time that became not his own.
Dad was a proud strong Irish man, a man of the hour: whether that was in his young days and pulling tug of war (I was told that team players were always excited when Dad was in their team as a win was likely a guarantee), or rounding sheep, or, a little late, making our house a home with his initiative mind, or just feeling safe in his arms when I would crawl excitedly over to him, as a child, when he came in from work. It is fair to say that when I went to him panicked that the cover of a favourite book had become detached from its spine, it was a doddle for him fix. A strand of cello tape later and he would say with a proud smile, that he could alleviate that panic I had, “As good as new” as he handed me back my book.

This strong character is something Dad will always be known for by myself, my family and just about everyone who knew him. Time took away a lot of things from Dad, but strength was not one. He would put up the toughest fight no matter what came his way. This is one of things that truly want to honour and keep alive- the sense of focus and determination he had- as I go about my days.

The aftershocks of Dad’s passing will be forever felt, as myself and the rest of my family try to navigate this huge space that has been left. There are so many things I want to say to Dad and will want to in the time before me. Finding comfort in little things has been something so soothing. Comfort in thinking what Dad might I have said. Comfort in thinking about his laugh. Comfort in signs to tell me that he’s nearby , like the sight of white feathers or seeing robins (his favourite birds) or a blue sky or a rainbow or the moon (when I was a child I would always ask him to take me out to see the moon before bed). Comfort in memories and sharing these with others, keeping him forever alive in some way.

Loss is an inconceivable thing and something that will always feel in this vein. It is so very hard to think that I am here writing this post. I guess the thing that I can only say here is that if you are experiencing something similar, of a loss, I hope you can find comfort however small it may be.

July 6, 2020July 6, 2020

Seeing Yourself As Enough

Dear Reader,

Ever get that feeling that you’re not enough? That you’re not doing enough? That what you are right now and who you are is not enough? Well this is something that can honestly feel quite lonely and depletes one’s energy and when in such a mind-set….the hope of this turning round does not seem like a move that can be made. However it’s me who is writing this post and even though I can annoy the crap out of myself being a positive Polly and sometimes just wanting to see the volume of water that is in the glass in whatever damn way (without a psychological explanation being attached to this), it is true that this is not a feeling that is felt by a singular person- it is experienced by many.

It feels like I’ve gone off into the deep end, I didn’t mean to here but fear of not doing enough are thoughts that I have been experiencing of late. Back in May I shared on my social media that I had been experiencing pain as a result of my Cerebral Palsy, which meant I couldn’t do very much at all for a while, and for someone like me who always wants to be a busy bee this was kinda hard. Since then these aches have been on and off depending on how much I’ve been doing. It’s that knowing that I’m not doing, not continually moving forwards, which at these times are my more prominent thoughts, the insistent chatter of what I could be doing clogs up the ol’ mind. Somehow this has more of an importance than it did before. I guess it’s a classic case of when you can’t do something, you want to do things even more with the imagination running wild with ideas. Ohhh how the mind chatters!

Sitting there with all these thoughts was kind of like toying with someone else’s story-it wasn’t I who was living out that day, it was a character I created in my brain. A character with no flaws who navigated a flawless day-ironically, this whole idea is flawed! The thing is by participating in such creativity and building a picture of a person of who you think you should be kind of puts one into self-destruction mode, picking out parts of oneself that aren’t enough, that they should be more focussed- basically berating anything that makes one human-the mistakes, the getting things wrong, the going at a different pace to everyone else, the not living up to expectations people or even you had of yourself … the list is endless. All this obsession over what you think you don’t measure up to will only make you feel worse.

I do think now more than ever we need to be kind to ourselves as well as each other. This year has thrown everyone sideways in one way or another, yet we can find ways to tear ourselves down and tell ourselves that we should be doing more or that we’re not doing what we should be. There is no ‘right’ way to think, but if we just found a way not to be too harsh or expect too much of ourselves and be a bit more gentle maybe we would start to feel a little lighter in a world that already seems so heavy. I guess what I want to say is that it’s okay if you are not where you thought you would be, focus on where you are and the pathways that could lead from there. It goes without saying that everyone will experience peaks and trots and just because you find yourself at a low, up against a challenge, facing a flare up, it does not mean you can’t get back or that it will be like this forever. I am saying this to you as well as myself, do not let these not so great days define who you are.

There’s that saying ride the wave. Although this can seem like a fleeting statement, it actually does have some merit-stay with me here. Instead of fighting what you are experiencing and burying yourself down some dark rabbit hole, I started to realise, when I had to take a break from things that rather than focusing on whether or not I was measuring up to being enough or trying to justify to myself as to why I was not doing thing, I started think about how just resting and being more present could just help the future me: if I rest now, I’ll be able to do more later.

All my love XX

October 7, 2019

Reframing Disability

✨? And don’t be made to think differently.

Happy Magic Monday My Fabulous Ones?✨

Image description: words on a yellow-green cut out piece of paper that reads “A disability is something that you have, it is not you.” The paper is placed on a pink and green background

September 9, 2019

Stop Hiding!!

? Happy Magic Monday my Fabulous Ones?

There’s a saying never be afraid who you are. I for one am a huge advocate of this. There was a time when I would ask “ Can you not get my wheelchair in the photo?” But really what is there to hide? Why should I hide apart of myself? Why should I fear the behaviours of others?

Ignoring apart of myself will only lead to misery, to fixate on a unhealthy desire to be someone that I’m not destined to be and really who I don’t want to be. The thing is this hiding thing came really from a place of wanting rather the needing ??‍♀️ and who honestly wants to hide?-unless you eat the last sweet in the packet and you feel all eyes glare at you ??

So for the last few years I have dropped this want to hide and have allowed my wheels to be seen …and they do also say give credit whet credit is due and my chariot really does need this after all where she have taken me!

Let us not be afraid of who we are, let’s try to acknowledge all parts of ourselves . If we just try and not let those naysayers pollute our perception and force us to believe that we “should” be a certain way. Would we really want to be around these people?

Show of them beautiful peacock feathers and don’t be afraid in doing this … and just a heads up make sure no one is around as you devour the last sweet ??????

[Image description: Rebecca is sitting in her wheelchair. Rebecca is smiling at the camera. Behind her is a grass area ]

August 12, 2019